(Roughly) Daily

Who among us has not dreamt of achieving that apex of achievement, having a sandwich named for us.

John Peck has imagined the menu in the ultimate rock and roll cafe, where one can select among such sandwiches as…

ABBA: Reindeer paté, candied rose petals, white bread.

Sex Pistols: Deep-fried Frank Sinatra LP, Russian mustard, spackle, tacks, stale rye bread.

Guns ’n Roses: Bacon-double cheeseburger, bittermelon jelly, Rogain aioli, sliced glazed donut.

Neil Young: Cubed ham, Kraft macaroni and cheese, blackened Anaheim peppers, 18-grain Anasazi bread.

Rolling Stones: Beef tongue, caviar, platinum-coated fried onions, ketchup, white bread.

Beach Boys: Grilled chicken breast, mustard, lettuce, SPF-50 sunscreen aioli, crispy fried peyote bits, white bread.

The Doors: Beer-battered fried chicken, mescaline ketchup, Navajo fry bread.

Huey Lewis and the News: Butterflied hot dog, pizza sauce, Cheez-Whiz, Dutch crunch.

Hall and Oates:Tuna salad, diet coleslaw, pomade, hamburger bun.

Prince: Braised peacock cheeks, lavender spread, mustard, mayo, baguette.

Grateful Dead: Lemon verbena sorbet, peanut butter, clarified hemp butter, deep-fried brownie bites, M&Ms, stale focaccia.

David Bowie: Curried snow leopard, mayo, garlic naan.

The Kinks: Roast beef, balsamic cigarette-butt reduction, dark rye.

John Cage: Silence, warmth, indirect sunlight, the memory of lettuce, the idea of bread.

Velvet Underground: Salami, cheddar, shredded pre-war 1000-Deutschmark bills, oil paint, heroin gravy, French roll.

Depeche Mode: Chicken breast, Swiss cheese, grilled suede, fried onions, mascara aioli, seeded baguette.

Ramones: Sliced hot dog, amphetamine ketchup, mustard, relish, white bread.

Many more delights at “Bandwiches,” In McSweeney’s.

***

As we ask for extra mayo, we might recall that it was on this date in 1989 when Rod Stewart (pulled-pork, shredded cabbage, Newcastle Brown Ale- Vaseline barbeque sauce, white bread) hit his head while on stage and knocked himself out in the middle of a performance.

Stewart in 1989, upright

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